C. Objections to Spanking Are Not Valid.

Some say spanking leads to child abuse or even constitutes child abuse.

The high-school parenting text Child Growth and Development, p315, says physical punishment is "unsatisfactory" because, "All physical punishment has the danger of turning into child abuse or causing injury when the adult is really angry. For this reason alone, it should be avoided."
Sweden has outlawed spanking on the grounds that it is child abuse. In this country, schoolteachers are generally forbidden to spank, and some people have tried to pass laws forbidding parents to spank their own children. Often overly zealous social workers harass parents and call them into court, simply because parents exercise Scriptural discipline.

We do not deny that child abuse exists. We deplore it as much or more than others do. But we affirm that scriptural spanking, rather than constituting child abuse, in fact helps to prevent it.
We have shown by the Scriptures that exercise of Scriptural discipline is an expression of love for children. It is done for the child's wellbeing. In contrast, the child abuser loses sight of the child's wellbeing and acts from selfishness and anger. Such conduct flatly contradicts the Bible and is not what we are defending.

Actually, proper spanking helps avoids child abuse. People abuse children because they do not know how to properly control them. As we have illustrated, the children's conduct frustrates and angers the parent, till finally he loses control and, in a fit of anger and frustration, does lasting harm to the child. If parents would instead learn to discipline their children when the need first becomes evident, the matter would never get so out of hand.

Others say spanking makes the child feel guilty and destroys his self-esteem.

"The chief danger of punishment is that it makes the child feel guilty - that he is bad, naughty" - The Complete Book of Mothercraft, p391 (via Plain Truth about Child Rearing, p21).

But wait! What if the child has been bad and naughty? What if he is guilty, but doesn't feel guilty? What if he has been disrespectful or has done what could lead him into sin? It sounds like punishment is just what he needs!

A fundamental error of modern psychology is that it often denies evil and guilt. It fails to hold people accountable for their misdeeds. It teaches them to have a high self-image by whitewashing and denying their guilt. But people remain unhappy and maladjusted, because sub-consciously they still know something is wrong. Worse yet, this approach leaves people with no real solution for their problem. The truth often is they are guilty; but by leading them to deny guilt, psychology leaves them with no way to remedy it.

The Bible teaches us to recognize that, when people do wrong, they are guilty and should be told so. If they stubbornly refuse to admit guilt, they should be punished so they suffer for their wrong till they admit it. This is true of children and adults.

Proverbs 20:30 - Blows and stripes cleanse away guilt and reach the inner depths of the heart. Spanking is not just an external act. It reaches the heart and teaches the child to become an upright, righteous person. It molds godly character.

But the Bible also has a solution for the guilt. When one is sorry, repents, apologizes, and corrects his conduct, he receives forgiveness from God and others who follow the Bible (Matt. 6:12-15; Luke 17:3,4). One reason many people do not appreciate the value of spanking, is that they do not understand God's concept of guilt and forgiveness.