Key #5: Authority (Control)

Authority is the right to give instructions and require obedience.

Our age generally rejects and even despises the concepts of authority, rules, law, and duty.
People insist on doing their own thing, being their own person, and having their own way. As one man said to me, "I don't want anybody telling me what to do."

So people demand "freedom" from restrictions. They object when government is firm with criminals or when schools enforce strict rules toward children. They want to loosen the application of God's laws: they object when strict obedience to truth is taught and when those who do not obey truth are rebuked and disciplined. They even object to the concept of a firm God who hates evil and punishes evildoers!

This rejection of authority is especially obvious in the modern concept of the family. How often do you see TV shows, books, movies, or cartoons that portray a father as a capable, responsible family leader? Generally, either he shares authority equally with the wife, or else he is a bumbler, dominated and manipulated by his wife.

Likewise society denies that children should be required to submit to parental authority.
Parent Effectiveness Training, introduced by Thomas Gordon, advocates that parents give up all use of authority. Family conflicts must be resolved by finding a course that is mutually agreeable to both parent and child. Neither is permitted to "impose" his solution on the other. (See the high school text Parenting and Children, by H. Westlake, pp. 46-50.)

The Children's Liberation Movement leads young people to rebel against parents like the Women's Liberation movement led women to rebel against their husbands.

We want the power to determine our own destiny. We want the immediate end of adult chauvinism ... Age might once have led to wisdom, but the old have proven themselves unable to deal with present reality ... the young must take the lead... - "Youth Liberation," Youth Liberation Press, via Christian Inquirer, 10/79

Child welfare agencies are often staffed by social workers who believe these modern views. They try to convince parents that they have no right to exercise firm leadership and will be subject to government prosecution if they do!

As a result, many children have their own parents "buffaloed." Parents are afraid that, if they cross their children, they will throw a fit, run away, get into drugs, report them to the government, or be taken away by government agencies. The children, not the parents, end up being the dominant influence in the home.

Nevertheless, we affirm that proper use of authority is an essential key to successful parenthood.