D. Natural Consequences

Some acts naturally lead to unpleasant consequences that teach the child a lesson without the parents' having to punish them.

If a child torments a cat and the parent warns him to quit, he may continue till the cat scratches him.

If the consequences are very severe and if the child would learn the lesson from a lesser punishment, we should prefer a lesser punishment (for example, spank the child instead of letting him burn himself on a hot stove). But sometimes a child simply won't learn from the parents' teaching.

Luke 15:14-17 - The father of the Prodigal Son allowed his son to suffer the consequences of doing wrong. The boy reached the bottom, but nobody bailed him out (including his father). The result is he "came to himself" and repented. Modern parents need to learn this lesson. [Cf. also 1 Sam. 8:9ff.]

Sometimes this method is the only one children will listen to. They may have to learn some lessons the hard way. If they won't listen to us, we should not protect them from the consequences of their wrong.

If a child makes a foolish debt, make him pay it off.

If he misbehaves at school, don't take his part against the teacher or school authorities. Let them punish him.

If he misbehaves toward a neighbor (as by damaging their property), make him go face the angry neighbor and fix what he broke.

If he breaks a law and the judge fines him, make him work to pay of the fine.
Many parents "bail out" their children when they get in trouble, and the children never learn to be responsible and avoid the foolish conduct. Sometimes the best punishment is to let the child suffer for his error and don't protect him from the consequences.

E. Logical Consequences

Sometimes we can think of a punishment that is logically associated with the wrong deed. It "fits the crime."

When a child accidentally spills or breaks something, spanking usually is not appropriate. Instead, have him clean up what he spilled or pay for a new one to replace what he broke.
If he misbehaves in how he uses a toy or equipment (bicycle), put the toy away where he can't use it for a specified time.

If he mistreats other family members, then he may be isolated from the family as by sitting on a chair in the corner. If children squabble and can't get along, they may be separated from one another so they can't play together.

F. Divine Corrections for Sin

When the child's conduct is sinful, we should use the same methods for correcting him that we should with others. This includes:

Use God's Word to instruct and rebuke them.

2 Timothy 3:16,17 [4:2-4] - Use the Bible to show them where they are wrong and warn them of the eternal consequences of such conduct.

Make clear that you are acting for the child's good. Don't lead the child to think the Bible is a weapon God provided for parents to get their own way. Show them that this is God's will and they must obey God.

Cooperate with other Christians and the church, when they rebuke the child.

Galatians 6:1 - Sometimes Christians know our children has sinned, so they try to talk to them about it. Parents in such cases may become defensive and try to protect their children. Instead we should realize that this is good for the children, and we should appreciate people who care enough to help. Remember the father of the prodigal, who allowed his son to suffer the consequences of his sin till the son repented.

2 Thessalonians 3:6,14,15 - If the child is a Christian who sins and the church exercises Scriptural discipline, we cooperate with the church and respect its decision. The Old Law taught parents to actively participate in congregational punishment of erring children (Deut. 21:18-21; 13:6-11; Zech. 13:3). New Testament discipline takes a different form, but the principle is the same. If the child sins, and we defend them in opposition to those who Scripturally reprove him, we become a partaker of his evil deed - 2 John 10,11.

Pray for the child to do right.

James 5:16 - Confess your faults to one another and pray for one another. When the child acknowledges he has done wrong, pray to God and ask God to help him do right. If he is old enough to be a Christian, then his disobedience to you was also a sin against God. Have him confess the sin to God and pray for forgiveness. (Acts 8:22; Matthew 6:12; 21:28-32; 2 Corinthians 7:10; 1 John 1:8-10; Proverbs 28:13)

Parents may find other means of motivating children, in addition to those mentioned here. But the principle always is: give pleasant consequences for good behavior, unpleasant consequences for bad behavior.